Little Toe of Tivahem
by jfine
Summary: It's Christmas and Tiva is going to happen. I can't promise you that this will be good, but I can promise that it will have toes in it and toes are awesome! So, yeah...here we go! And oh yeah, lots of TivaSmut!
1. Toe'd

Tony and Ziva walked through a set of doors into a large apartment building. She walked over to wall of mailboxes and ran her finger along the names until she came to a William Sanders, "Found him."

"What floor?" Tony asked.

"Fifth." Ziva replied, "Apartment 5C."

Tony took a step towards the elevator, but groaned seeing an out of order sign next to the call button, "Seriously?"

"What?" Ziva asked.

"Elevator's out." Tony answered and looked towards the stairs, letting out a sigh.

"Back bugging you again?" Ziva rubbed up the middle of Tony's back, "Thankfully, it is only five floors, yes?"

"I guess."

"Look, the quicker we do it, the quicker we can go eat." She stated, making her way over to the stairs.

"Ooh...good point." Tony's eyes lit up and he jogged past Ziva and up the first set of stairs.

Ziva laughed and followed Tony up the stairs.

"You're still coming for Christmas dinner, right?" Tony asked, looking back over his shoulder, "Uhhh, Dad wanted me to make sure, about food and such."

"Yes, I will be there."

"Good, good. He's driving me freakin' crazy and my kitchen...Oy Vey!"

Ziva chuckled, "You should feel lucky, you are getting a home cooked meal."

"Lucky? He's never did this before and now, all of sudden, out of nowhere, the DiNozzo family Christmas dinner?" Tony shook his head, perplexed by the entire thing.

"You are over thinking things, Tony."

Tony stopped half-way up the third set of stairs, "I wish I could believe that, Ziva. I really do."

Ziva climbed past Tony, giving him a pant on the shoulder, "Come on and we will go to Five Guys when we are done." She smiled, "My treat."

"Heh." Tony grinned, "Lead the way."

They made it up to the fifth floor and made their way over to apartment 5C. Ziva knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" A man's voice carried through the door.

"NCIS." Tony called back.

The sound of a dead bolt unlocking and the creaking of the door as it swung open, "Who?"

"Navy Crim..." Tony began.

"Gun!" Ziva shouted as the man pulled a handgun from his waistband. She lunged forward, grabbing his wrist. The weapon went off, firing a round towards the floor. Tony immediately tackled the man, knocking the gun from his hand and forcing all three of them to the ground. The gun crashed, clanking against the hardwood floor before coming to a rest a few feet away. The man reached for the weapon, but Tony wrapped his arms around his neck, yanking him back.

"I will kill you." Ziva calmly stated, cocking her weapon as she held it against his forehead, kneeling next to them.

The man lifted his arms into the air, giving up.

Tony turned the man over and quickly cuffed his hands behind his back.

Ziva got to her feet, her weapon still pointed at the man's head. Her eyes opened wide, "Tony."

"What?" He asked.

"Tony." Ziva sharply gasped, her weapon slightly lowered.

Tony looked at Ziva and followed her eyes behind him, seeing a blood trail that led to his left foot. He fell back to a seated position and peered through a bullet hole that had completely passed through his shoe and foot. He reached out with his hand and extended his finger through the hole. He grimaced, gritting his teeth.

Ziva slapped at his hand, then smacked him on the back of head.

"Ow!" Tony looked at Ziva, "What was that for?"

"What are you doing?" Ziva yelled, "DON'T TOUCH IT!" She shook her head and cursed repeatedly in Hebrew as she took out her cell phone to dial 911.

* * *

Ziva paced back and forth in the hospital waiting room; angry, worried.

"What happened?" Gibbs questioned, walking into the waiting room.

Ziva turned, "It was my fault."

"What was your fault?"

"I wrestled the gun from his hand, it went off. Tony got shot." Ziva said, consumed with guilt.

Gibbs grabbed Ziva by her upper arms, "Stop...he's going to be fine."

"I was reckless, Gibbs."

"Ziva..." Gibbs whispered, "Stop. Take a deep breath."

Ziva closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Better?"

Ziva nodded, "Yes."

"Good, now tell me what happened?"

Ziva suddenly, let out a deep laugh.

"What?"

"He was more concerned about his shoe. His stupid 400 dollar shoe."

Gibbs chuckled, "Sounds like our DiNozzo."

"And you should have heard the bitching, going down every one of those steps...I wanted to shoot him!"

"He lost his pinky toe."

"What?" Ziva squinted at Gibbs, "How do you know?"

"They told me."

Ziva started to get visibly upset, "And why did they not tell me?!"

"Ziva..."Gibbs smiled at her, "You might think you're his boss, but I really am."

Ziva tilted her head toward, but raised it right back up and smiled back, "You know, that was a lot of blood just for a pinky toe."

"You be sure to tell him that when you see him." Gibbs smirked.

* * *

The door to Tony's apartment swung open, "Go on, Junior." Senior told his son, holding the door open for him.

Tony carefully moved through the doorway using a set of crutches and plopped himself down on the black leather couch.

"Wait, wait." Ziva said, moving in behind the DiNozzo men, carrying a large pizza box. She handed the pizza to Tony and grabbed a pillow that was sitting in a black leather recliner and placed it on the coffee table and patted it, "The doctor said you have to put your foot up."

Tony just looked at Ziva, in pain and exhausted.

"Do not give me that look, just do it." Ziva ordered and he did with her help.

Tony grunted as he slouched back, sinking deeper into the couch and let the pizza box fall to his stomach. A small smile washed over his face at the thought of a slice of pizza and he opened the box, taking a slice from inside. He went to take a bite, but any desire he had for pizza quickly died and it ended up back in the box.

"Really? You are saying no to pizza?"

"I'm just not in the mood."

"For pizza? Since when?"

"Ziva...why are you here?"

"What do you mean, why am I here?"

"I'm sure you have better things to do than...this."

"You...you, are my friend, Tony and I care about you."

"I know why you're here. It wasn't your fault. It was accident and besides, it was just a toe."

"Excuse me? Just a toe? Are you kidding me? How can you say that?" Ziva started to lose her cool.

"Meaning, it could've been much worse." Tony explained.

Ziva shook her head, she let out a conflicted laugh, "I do not get you...sometimes..."

"What, Ziva? Do you want me get mad at you or something?"

"YES!" Ziva hollered, "I want you to act like you actually care about something."

"I care, Ziva...too much, probably."

"About what? About what, Tony?"

Tony swallowed hard, but didn't answer.

Ziva raised her hands to her face and ran her fingers up and through her hair and gritted her teeth in displeasure. She hastily moved to the door, where she opened it and slammed it shut as she left. Seconds later, she returned and sat down in front of Tony on the coffee table, "What happened to the new us, Tony? Hmm, you know, the post elevator us?"

"Look under the tree."

"What?" Ziva was confused.

"There's a present under there for you."

Ziva cocked her head to the side and looked at the Christmas tree, "W-why? We do not get each other presents, Tony."

"Just go get the present, Ziva. Please."

Ziva stood up and walked over to the Christmas tree and squatted down, a square, flat present was under the tree, wrapped in Mighty Mouse Christmas paper, on the tag, it read, "To: Ziva From: Tony"

"Open it."

"But I did not get you anything."

"It doesn't matter, just open it."

Ziva tore at the paper, it was wrapped tightly with a lot of scotch tape. She actually smiled, knowing he wrapped it himself. She stripped away a large section of paper and immediately choked up seeing her sister Tali, next to her was her mother and finally herself as a teenager, "Where did you get this?"

"Schmiel."

Ziva slid her fingers over the faces of her mother and sister, tears trickling down her cheeks, "Todah...I love it, Tony."

* * *

AN#1 - His pinky toe will be missed

AN#2 - I used an entire roll of scotch tape to wrap 4 of my wife's presents. I'm awesome!


	2. Is That Considered A Gift?

"Perfect." Senior boasted, placing a tray of cookies on the kitchen counter top.

"I'm leaving." Ziva made it be known, standing in the large doorway between the kitchen and living room, "Would you..."

"What's that?" Senior turned, looking at Ziva.

"He fell asleep on the couch. I finally got him to eat a piece of pizza and take his pain pill."

"Ahh, good, good, but, uhh, you don't have to leave, Ziva. There's more than enough room for you stay. I'm sure Junior..."

"Oh, I'm not going home." Ziva stated, "I need to find Tony a present."

Senior looked at his watch, "It's nearly 7 pm on Christmas Eve, that's going to be a challenge."

"Yes, but I have to try." Ziva replied, "Can you watch him for me?"

"Of course, of course." Senior answered, "Here, take a few of these with you, to keep you warm." He offered Ziva a few cookies from the tray.

Ziva cocked her head slightly, "What are they?"

"Snickerdoodles." Senior smiled, "Junior's favorite, his mother's recipe."

Ziva smiled back and stepped over to Senior, "Tony showed me a photo of her...she was...very beautiful."

"Yes." Senior nodded and handed the cookies to Ziva, "She was taken far too young."

"I...I am sorry."

Senior let out a small sigh, "It should've been me and not her, a child shouldn't have to grow up without a mother."

Ziva leaned into Senior, giving him a hug and layed her head on his chest.

"Ziva...can I ask you to do something?"

Ziva pulled away from Senior, "Do you need me to pick up something for dinner?"

"No, no." Senior raised his hands, "Never mind, uhh, you better get going before everything closes."

Ziva nodded and turned to leave. She walked out of the kitchen and over to the couch where Tony was fast asleep. She patted the top of his head before quietly leaving through the front door.

* * *

Ziva crept back into the apartment, it was darkened, the Christmas tree was the only thing illumating the way.

"Where did you go?" A voice rang out. Tony shielded his eyes as he turned on a lamp.

"I uhh, had to get something from home...how are you feeling?" Ziva asked, obviously hiding something behind her back.

Tony smacked his lips together, his mouth was dry, "Uhh, can you get me a glass of water?"

"Sure." Ziva hurried past Tony and into the kitchen. Moments later, she came back with a glass of water.

Tony took the glass from Ziva and took a sip, coughing as he did so.

Ziva sat down next to Tony and began rubbing on his chest, "Are you okay?"

Tony looked down at Ziva's hand, "Yeah, thank you."

Ziva smiled at Tony, "Are you in pain, because it's about time for another pain pill."

"No, no, I'm good, besides those things knock me out."

"That's good, Tony, you need your rest...I am worried about you."

"Oh, Ziva...if you think this is bad, you should've seen me with the plague. Now, that was bad." Tony softly laughed, but it quickly turned to a cough.

"I wish I could have been there to take care of you." Ziva ran the back of her fingers along the top of his cheek and into his hair, catching herself just as her fingertips grazed his temple, pulling her hand away.

"I doubt that very much, I was a whiny little..."

"Bitch, yes?" Ziva guessed with a smile.

Tony turned his head and just smiled along with her, "Okay, I think I'm ready for that pill now."

Ziva extended her arm, grabbing a bottle of painkillers from the coffee table and opened the lid. She shook one out and moved it Tony's mouth, "Open up."

Tony opened his mouth and Ziva tossed it in, "Heh. Two points." He quipped and took a drink of water.

Ziva rolled her eyes, but smiled just the same, "Did you joke this much when you had the plague?"

"Ziva...you do know me, right?"

Ziva laughed, "Sorry, that was a stupid question."

"It's alright...I still love ya."

Ziva smiled, "So, I have been thinking..."

"About?" Tony closed his eyes and tilted his head back.

"About us...about..."

A soft snore escaped from Tony's lips.

Ziva moved her hand to Tony's shoulder to wake him, but stopped. She cozied up next to him, using his shoulder as a pillow, letting him sleep.

* * *

Ziva moaned as she woke up, peeling her face away from Tony's arm.

"Good morning." Senior smiled, standing next to Christmas tree, "Sleep well?"

Ziva sat up and scooted to the edge of couch, rubbing her face in her hands, "What time is it?"

"Nearly 7, want some breakfast?"

Ziva shook her head no, "Any tea?"

"Uhh, yeah, I think I saw some earlier, let me go look."

Ziva stood up and joined Senior in the kitchen.

"How'd shopping go?" Senior asked, placing a cup of water into the microwave to heat up.

"Awful." Ziva replied, "I am SO glad I'm Jewish, I could not deal with that every year."

Senior pulled the cup from the microwave and brought it over to Ziva and grinned and gestured upward with a shake of his head.

Ziva looked up, seeing a mistletoe and just chuckled. She quickly gave Senior kisses on both cheek before grabbing the mistletoe and headed back towards the living room. She moved to the couch, but tripped on one of Tony's crutches and fell face forward into his lap.

Tony sprang to life and focused his eyes downward. Ziva scrambled back to a seat position next to him, "What are you doing?"

Ziva chuckled nervously, "I tripped."

Tony squinted at his lap and then slowly rotated his head towards Ziva, "Is that mistletoe in my lap?"

* * *

AN - God, I am a joke whore.

AN2 - Suck it, Mayans!


	3. Spooning in Paris

"It's okay." Tony grinned, "I'd love a Christmas blowjob."

Ziva tilted her head, shocked by his words, "Excuse...me?"

"God, you smell good..."

"Tony!" Ziva raised her voice and shook his arm.

Tony looked at Ziva, "Heh." He tried to grin, but couldn't, "I uhh, I'm not dreaming am I?"

Ziva slowly shook her no.

"Oh, God..." Tony started to panick, "I should've known, you don't smell that good in my dreams."

"Wait...you dream about me?" A small smiled found it's way to Ziva's lips, but she wiped it away before he could see it.

"Uhh, Ziva."

"What?"

"Your hand."

Ziva looked at her hand, it was in Tony's lap. She yanked it back, along with the mistletoe and jumped to her feet, "This never happened, Tony."

"Right." Tony nodded, looking up at Ziva, "Totally never happened."

Ziva turned and gritted her teeth as she walked back into the kitchen.

Tony smacked his palm into his face and just shook his head.

"So, what happened?" Senior asked with a smile.

Ziva saw the smile on Senior's face and sighed, "I cannot do this."

"Do what?" Senior asked.

"I am...going to go."

"Oh, no, you can't, Ziva...I'm cooking...what did Junior do?"

"Nothing...he did nothing...we did nothing." Ziva sighed yet again and lowered her head, spinning on her heels and stepped back into the living room, but was surprised when she didn't see Tony, "Tony?" She called in a worried tone.

Ziva made her way to the hallway and knocked on his bedroom door, "Tony? You in there?" She turned the knob and peeked inside, Tony was laying in bed, holding a pillow over his face. She moved to the side of the bed and reached out for the pillow, but instead slipped into bed with him, pressing her chest up against his side and then pulled down the pillow, revealing his face, "Hi." She whispered.

"Hey." Tony whispered back.

Ziva slid her hand across his chest, "This remind you of anything?"

"Heh. A few things, but most recently, Paris, but the bed was much smaller."

"Yeah...we had to...what is that word."

"Spoon."

"Yes, that is it, spoon. We had to spoon."

"Hey, I offered to sleep on the floor."

"I know you did, but spooning had its advantages."

"You can say it: you were cold."

Ziva softly laughed, "Yes, I was cold, but do not act like you did not enjoy it."

"It was alright." Tony acted like it was nothing special.

"Alright? Just alright?" Ziva lifted her head, "You were gitty in the morning, said you had a good night."

"And I did." Tony answered, "But that wasn't the best part."

"No?" Ziva was intrigued, "Do tell."

"Holding you in my arms...it just felt good."

"Good?"

"Great even."

Ziva lowered her head back down, "I remember falling asleep fast, I felt..."

"Safe?" Tony asked, turning his head towards her.

"Yes, protected." She replied with a smile.

"And it kind of made my back pain go away...for one day." Tony admitted.

"Does your back hurt now?"

"No." Tony shook his head, "I don't think so."

"Good." Ziva leaned into Tony, giving him a peck on the lips, "Can you still feel your toe?"

"What, you think you're a miracle worker now?" Tony grinned.

Ziva chuckled, "Nnnnooooo."

Tony stared into Ziva's eyes and eased his lips over to hers, gently kissing her back, "Are you sure I'm not dreaming?"

"Do you want me to pinch you?" Ziva grinned and let her hand wander downward from Tony's chest, she slipped her fingers into the waistband of his sweat pants and was just about to grab him when...

"Junior..." Senior spoke up, opening the door.

Ziva reacted by rolling away from Tony and as a result, rolled right off the bed.

"Oh sorry..." Senior smiled, looking down at Ziva on the floor, "But I guess this mean you'll be staying for dinner after all?"

* * *

AN - Happy Santa Day!


	4. Decisions Decisions

Ziva stood looking into the bathroom mirror, "What are you doing?" She asked her reflection, "He kissed you back, no?" She nodded answering herself, "He did, but he also asked me if he was dreaming...is that a good thing?" She gritted her teeth, not knowing, but smiled, "He did say he had dreams about me." She let out a small chuckle, shaking her head, "Where I apparently gave him blowjobs."

She rolled her eyes and lowered her head into her hands.

"Okay, okay." She slid her hands from her face and turned on the faucet, splashing some water in her face, "What is wrong with you? You are a trained assassin, stop it. I said STOP IT. You know what you have to do." She took a deep breath and stepped back and rolled her head side to side, "He likes your hair down, right?" She pulled at the back of her hair, freeing her ponytail, shaking her head wildly, but sighed, "Or does he like it up?"

She just stared at herself in the mirror, "When did you turn into such a girl?" She swallowed hard, "Feelings suck."

She stood straight up and placed her hands on her chest and took a deep breath and caught herself adjusting her breasts, "Now what are you doing? You don't even have boobs." She sighed yet again and just went for it, moving to the bathroom door, but stopped before opening it, "Knowing my luck and knowing us, he will be gone."

She turned the handle and opened the door and nearly ran into Tony. He was standing directly in front of her, "Tony...what are you doing up?"

"I was worried about you, you ran in here after Dad left, are you hurt? Are you okay?"

"I am not injured." Ziva replied, "But you should not be up, your toe..."

Tony pressed his palm to Ziva's cheek, caressing it, "Are you sure you're okay?"

Ziva smiled, "Yes."

"Good." Tony smiled back, "I would hate for you to have a broken ass on Christmas."

"Me, too." Ziva laughed, "Here, let me help you." She put her shoulder under his arm and helped him back to the bed.

Tony grimaced as he sat down on the edge of the bed, "I hope I didn't overstep my bounds getting you that picture."

"What?" Ziva asked, "No, not at all."

"I know how you get mad at me when I go behind your back and such."

Ziva softly sat down next to Tony, "Is that really how I come off to you?"

"Well...I am kind of nosy."

Ziva scoffed, "Kind of?" She laughed.

"Yeah, yeah...but I do it mostly, because...well..."

"Well, what?"

"I don't want you to get hurt. I hate that. I mean, I really HATE that."

"Tony...I can take care of myself."

"I know that, but..."

"Tony..." Ziva lifted her hands, cupping his face, "...you just want to protect me, yes?" She smiled.

"I'm tired of losing people, Ziva, especially the ones I love and I can't lose you, not again."

Ziva's hands slipped down to Tony's neck and pushed him back onto the bed, she aggressively straddle him, kissing him passionately.

Tony let out a deep groan, "Ow." He uttered in a high-pitched voice.

"What?" Ziva gasped, between kisses.

"Your knee." Tony uttered.

Ziva pulled back and saw that her knee had slammed into his groin, "NO!" She yelled, "Is he okay? I need him!"

Tony started to laugh.

"Seriously, is he okay?" Ziva asked.

Tony rolled Ziva onto her back and smiled down at her, "I'm okay, too, by the way."

Ziva chuckled, "Good...now, on with the show." She smiled up at him, giving him another kiss.

"As soon as you lock the door." Tony replied, kissing her back.

"Your Dad!" Ziva shouted and squirmed her way out from under Tony.

"Yeah, what about him?" Tony asked, sitting up.

"I am..." Ziva rapidly moved her arms, trying to express what she was trying to say, "...I did not lie, Tony."

"What do you mean? Didn't lie?"

"I get very loud, Tony...very."

"Heh. Yeah, you're a screamer, I remember." Tony grinned, but it quickly disappeared, finally realizing what it all meant, "Awww, shit." He groaned, laying back.

Ziva sat down next to Tony and fell back so she was laying next to him, "We could kill him."

* * *

AN - Do you think Ziva has killed to get laid?

AN2 - I'm all for killing Senior if if means Tiva happens.

AN3 - I was naughty boy, Santa didn't bring me anything. :(


	5. Feeling The Love

Tony shuffled his feet on his way to the piano bench and eased himself down, leaning his crutches against the piano. He put his hands together and cracked his knuckles before resting them down on the keys. He just started to play when Ziva spoke up, "For a guy on crutches, you sure get around."

"Have a good nap?" Tony smiled and patted the piano bench, gesturing for her to join him.

Ziva smiled back, "Yeah." She walked over and sat down next to him.

"Any requests?" Tony asked.

Ziva shook her head no and rested her head on his shoulder.

Tony began playing again, "Do you know this?" He asked.

"No, what is it?"

"What will do you do when you get lonely..." Tony softly sang, "...and nobody's waiting by your side?" He looked at Ziva, "You've been running and hiding much too long. It's just your foolish pride...Zeeeeva, you've got me on knees, Ziva...I'm begging darling please, Ziva...darling won't you ease my worried mind." He stopped playing, "And like a fool, I fell in love with you..." He stopped singing and just stared into her eyes.

Ziva laughed, "Kiss me, damn it."

"Heh." He leaned over, placing his left hand on the small of her back. He raised his right hand to her left cheek, caressing it lovingly. She closed her eyes and opened her mouth slightly. He sucked the tip of her tongue into his mouth, teasing it with his own, wetting her lips before feasting on them as they kissed.

Ziva placed her hands on his chest and pushed, pulling away from him as she did, "Be right back." She hurried up from the bench.

"Yes, sure, I wasn't sucking on your tongue or anything."

Ziva laughed and moved into the kitchen, returning with a small box in her hand.

Tony squinted at it, "What's that?"

"Your Christmas gift." Ziva smiled, sitting back down next to him.

Tony took the box from her, "Let me guess, a condom and a key to your apartment."

Ziva laughed, "No...but now that you mention it, that would have been a good gift."

Tony smirked at her.

"Open it."

Tony lifted the top off from the box and looked inside, "Uhh, Ziva...it's empty?"

Ziva nodded and moved her lips to his ear, "That's because I'm wearing it." She whispered.

Tony's eyes wandered up and down her body, "Heh. What color?"

Ziva just smiled, not saying a word.

"Black?"

Ziva continued to smile.

"White?"

"Not telling." Ziva's smile widened.

"Ohhhh, come on, just a hint...does it rhyme with mink?"

Ziva laughed, "Anything else you want for Christmas?" She changed the subject.

"You're evil, you know that, right?" Tony grinned and looked back at the piano. He began playing again, "All I want for Christmas is my pinky toe, my pinky toe, just my pinky toe...all I want for Christmas is my pinky toe..."

Ziva shook her head at his silliness.

"And a blowjob." Tony quickly added with a grin.

Ziva laughed, "And you will return the favor, yes?"

"Tenfold, Ziva. Tenfold." Tony smiled.

"I do not know what that means, but from your smile..."

Tony kissed her again, "Yes, it's a good thing."

Ziva chuckled, "A very good thing."

"Guys, we'll be eating in about 15 minutes." Senior called out from the kitchen.

Ziva looked at her watch, bewildered, "But It is only noon."

"That's how my Mom always did it. We'd have the sit down meal at lunch and then snack on leftovers the rest of the day."

"Aww, traditions." Ziva smiled and gave Tony a kiss, "We will have to start our own traditions."

* * *

"Something wrong with your food, Ziva?" Senior asked holding a plate of food, sitting back in a black recliner in the living room.

"No." Ziva smiled, poking at her turkey with her fork as she and Tony sat on the couch, "It is a fine...delicious actually." She quickly took a bite of it.

"It's okay, you don't have to eat it if you don't want to." Senior stated.

"It is not the food, Mr. DiNozzo...Tony."

Senior nodded, "I know...oh, did I tell you, Junior, my friend Al's in town."

"The Prince?"

"Right." Senior replied, "I thought I'd go over there and pay him a visit."

"Now?"

"Yeah." Senior answered, "Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, not at all." Ziva eagerly interjected herself into the conversation.

Senior looked at Ziva and smiled, "Could you help an old man up?"

Ziva jumped to her feet and extended her arm and helped Senior to his feet, "A word, Ziva."

Ziva nodded and followed Senior into the kitchen, "Do you need a ride?"

"No." Senior replied, "Could you take care of my boy."

"Of course, you will be back later, no?"

"That's not what I meant, Ziva." Senior took Ziva's hands in his, "The way you two look at each other...and I have no doubt that he will take care of you. I just need to know that you will..."

"I will, you have my word." Ziva nodded with smile, "Even if it kills us both."

Senior laughed.

"Is Prince Omar Ibn Alwaan actually in town?"

"No." Senior shook his head.

"Then you do not need..."

"Yes, I do." Senior stopped her, giving her a kiss on the cheek, "Welcome to the family."

* * *

AN - Senior isn't a douche for once! Yay!

AN2 - I wonder what the next update is going to be about. Hmm...


	6. Finally!

Warning, this is complete and utter TivaSmut...and with that, on with the show!

* * *

"You look comfy." Ziva poked her head into the bedroom from the en suite bathroom. Tony was laying in bed, his hands were behind his head, resting on a pillow.

Tony turned his head towards Ziva, "You were the one who told me to get naked and get in bed."

"And are you?" Ziva asked with a smile.

"Maybe." Tony grinned and slipped his hands apart and started moving them down, he took a hold of the honey colored covers and was about to peel them back.

"No, I will do it." Ziva called out, "It will be more fun that way."

"What are you doing anyway?" Tony wondered.

"I am getting sexy for you."

"All you had to do was show up, Ziva."

Ziva smiled and let out a small chuckle, "You can stop, I am going to sleep with you already."

"I meant it." Tony replied, "Just look at you...your feet are cute, your legs...wow, your tummy? Yummy."

Ziva laughed.

"Heh. Your ass..." Tony just smiled, "Those dimples on your back..."

"What about them?" Ziva asked.

"I just want to run my fingers over them, my thumbs..."

"Go on." Ziva said, stepping into the doorway, she was wearing a large white towel around her torso.

"My thumbs teasing your dimples, my fingertips easing along your hips as I.."

"Thrust into me, yes?" Ziva took a step closer, turning as she did. She let the towel fall from her body. She was completely naked, her back turned away from him.

Tony reached out with his right arm, but stopped, choosing to slide his legs out from under the covers instead. His fingertips made contact with her hips slightly before his thumbs teased her dimples.

Ziva closed her eyes and fell back into his arms and down onto his lap. She laughed as she landed, "Someone is happy to see me."

"More like happy to feel you." Tony countered, letting his hands drift forward and up her stomach. She quickly covered his hands with hers as he reached her breasts, pressing her back against his chest. She tilted her head to side so she could look into his eyes, "God, you're beautiful." He gushed about her.

"I see you did not say anything about my breasts." Ziva stated.

Tony gently squeezed with his hands, letting out a smile, "They're perfect."

Ziva laughed, "They do not exist."

"Uhh, I beg to differ, my hands are holding something." Tony smiled and gave her a peck on the lips, "And besides, it's not about the size, Ziva, it's about what's behind them."

Ziva swung around, being careful of his left foot and straddled his thighs. Her right hand wandered downward, capturing his manhood with her fingers, lightly stroking it. She looked down, "I think he likes me...he's growing." She laughed, looking back up into his eyes.

Tony fell back, turning as he did, taking Ziva with him. He moved them to their sides and pulled the covers over them.

Ziva pulled her lower leg out from under Tony, bringing her knee up, pressing it against her chest. He guided her other leg over his hip and lovingly ran his hand up and down her leg.

Ziva gasped as his fingers made their way up between her legs, "She likes you, too." She smiled, giving him a kiss, "Make love to me." She whispered, giving him again.

Tony pulled his hand out from under the covers, giving Ziva's hair a tussle, which made her smile. He smiled back, "Heh. I love doing that." He then turned slightly, reaching back towards his nightstand to get a condom, but Ziva grabbed his wrist, "What?" He asked, looking back at her.

"You do not need it." Ziva said, cupping his cheek with her palm, leaning his face back to hers.

"Are you sure?"

Ziva just smiled as she dipped her hand back under the covers and guiding him. She gasped again, this time deeper and much louder.

"You okay?" Tony whispered.

Ziva nodded, grasping his chin with her fingers and pulled his lips to hers, kissing him as she became more and more vocal.

Tony buried his left hand into the back of Ziva's hair and held and caressed the back of her neck as he made love to her.

Ziva turned her face into the pillow, gnashing down on it, which only made Tony quicken his pace. She arched her back, letting out a joyful moan as she escalated closer and closer to climax.

Tony turned her onto her back and disappeared under the covers. Ziva flew up to a sitting position, sweating profusely as her hands shot under the covers, her fingers dug into his hair as he feasted her.

Ziva fell back, bucking her hips and screamed, "KEN!" over and over again.

Tony rocketed back up, kissing and feeding on her blissful shrieks. He slipped back into her and she was gone, not being able to control herself. She had made Kim Catrall's sex scene in Porky's look pale in comparison and he would jokingly tell her that later, as well as having 11 complaints about that night. She was bummed it was only 11, until she found out there were only 8 apartments in the building, but anyway, that's for another story.

* * *

AN - If you haven't seen Porky's, rent it. It's awesome.

AN2 - Do we need more TivaSmut or was this enough?

AN3 - I hurt my left hand. That's like my second favorite drinking hand damn it!

AN4 - BTW, Ken means "Yes" in Hebrew in case you don't know.

AN5 - I'm gonna go pass out now. Bye!


	7. Now That's An Awesome T-Shirt!

Exactly one year later...

* * *

Tony was laying in bed, watching television.

"Tony, I talked to your father earlier." Ziva spoke up from the other room, "He wanted me to wish you a Merry Christmas."

Tony picked up the remote control, turning off the TV, "He didn't want to talk to me?"

"It was brief, I heard a woman's voice in the background, she was urging him to come."

Tony groan, "Not something you want to hear on Christmas...well, ever, really."

Ziva walked into the bedroom from the en suite bathroom, holding her baby bump, "What was that?"

Tony sat up in bed smiling, "C'mere." He urged, his eyes fixated on her.

Ziva stopped at the foot of bed, "What?"

"You're..."

"Oh, do not even start, "Ziva groaned, rolling her eyes, "I am...feel disgusting."

"Ziva..."

Ziva sighed and wobbled her way around the edge of the bed.

Tony stood up and raised his hands to Ziva's cheeks and planted a huge kiss on her lips, "Everything about you is perfect...you're beautiful and sexy and smart and you know how to kill a person 18 different ways with a paperclip..." He grinned, "...and hell, your wobble? So freakin' adorable!" He exclaimed with joy, "Seriously, it is."

Ziva laughed, "It is 19 now, actually." Which quickly turned to a giggle.

"So, are you gonna start believing me?"

Ziva shook her head side-to-side, "No." She laughed.

Tony sat and pulled down on the bottom of her shirt, "A DiNozzo BUN in the Ninja's Oven!" He read word for word from the yellow shirt she was wearing. He smiled up at her and pulled her closer, resting his head against her baby bump.

Ziva raised her hands and slowly began to slide her fingers through his hair, "I know you did not want to know, but I feel I have to tell you that..."

Tony tilted his head up, so that he was looking up at her, "It's a girl, isn't it?"

"Yes." Ziva nodded with a smile, "And a boy."

"And a boy?" Tony repeated her words.

"Yes, we are having twins."

"Twins?" Tony whispered, "A girl and a boy?"

Ziva smiled down at him, "Yes, I have a picture if you want to see."

"Oh, you can see the penis?" Tony started to get excited.

Ziva laughed, "Yes."

"My boy has a penis!"

"And your daughter has a vagina." Ziva chuckled.

"Oh God..."

"What?"

"I'm never going to sleep again."

Ziva laughed hard, "Do not worry, Tony, Tali will be very protected."

Tony looked up into Ziva's eyes before looking back to her tummy. He pressed his lips to it, "Shalom, Tali."

"And Anthony." Ziva added with a smile.

"Heh. Can the world handle 3 Tony DiNozzo's? Well, a little less than 3, I am missing my pinky toe."

Ziva slowly shook her head, but couldn't help but laugh, "You are a dork."

"Yup." Tony smiled up at her, "But I'm your dork."

"Yeah, well, the store told me my warranty ran out." Ziva smirked.

"Hey!"

Ziva chuckled.

"I think I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat, you want me to bring you something?"

"Mmhmm." Ziva smiled, "And I want to make love."

Tony cocked his head to the side, "At the same time?"

"Is that possible?" Ziva retorted with a small laugh.

* * *

AN - We all know Ziva would crave Italian sausage while preggers.

AN2 - Pregnant Ziva was adorable! Tony, get on that.


End file.
